ugh.

i've got some sort of illness and it's messing with my head both literally and figuratively.

it feels just like i did when i was pregnant, which is causing me all sorts of stupid doubt and hope and frustration.

home tests tell me no, and the truth is that i don't ovulate without medical intervention so the odds that i suddenly started producing and dropping healthy eggs the month after my second miscarriage in a row...well...let's just say they seem astronomically small.

so anyhow, i'm not feeling well and hopefully whatever it is will pass soon. cuz i really don't want to feel this crappy unless there's a good reason.